My life right now is filled with dirty diapers, bottles, spit-up, crying, no vacations, rarely seeing friends, going to bed early, and a messy house. Most nights one or both of the kids have been crying about something and it’s chaotic until both are in bed. My favorite thing to say to my husband lately is, “it’s just the season of life we are in.”
When things are at the craziest, I try to remember that it won’t always be like this. A few weeks ago I heard the song “It Won’t Be Like This For Long” by Darius Rucker which struck a chord with me. One day my days will be filled with quiet, an empty dishwasher, time for vacations, and staying up late. Then, I will miss my kids being little and the chaos that went with it.
A Temporary Hermit
Sometimes I feel like a hermit. Taking two young children anywhere can be a challenge. Not only do we have to make sure we have everything to feed, clothe, diaper, and even entertain them, but how is it going to go once we are there? Will we have a meltdown in church? Will that trip to Indy throw off naps so much that we have a monster on our hands in the evening? And, will we have a crying kid the whole drive? These questions alone makes me want to hibernate in my house until my kids are older. In this season of life, we just aren’t able to make every event we receive an invite for.
However, I miss seeing my friends and just going out. Sometimes I long for the nights of going out to dinner with friends, maybe going dancing, seeing a movie, or just being responsible for only myself. Right now with two kids, it’s difficult to get away. Yes, my husband can stay with the kids or they can go to their grandparent’s house since we are fortunate to have family close by and willing to watch them. But I have found in my short time as a parent that a schedule is king! A normal bedtime and a relatively normal schedule keep my kids and our house sane. Plus they are only little once, so when my kids are older, I’ll be able to reconnect more with friends. Thankfully a lot of my friends are in this stage of life too, so I hope they understand. I miss you guys.
Vacations Will Have to Wait
My husband and I recently traveled out of state with our kids for Easter. And what a fun time that was. We had multiple fits of crying, runny noses, and spit up. Oh, and we switched movies four times, and I sat between two car seats for hours. Now, I definitely wouldn’t classify this as a vacation. Two kids in a car to go visit family, sure, but NOT a relaxing vacation. How I long for the beach and going out to eat trying new restaurants… but that type of vacation will have to wait. I don’t think the stress is worth it. (More power to those of you that pull it off!) I think we will wait until the kids are older to attempt that.
My House is Messy and I’ve Learned to Accept It
Right now it seems like I constantly have bottles, burp cloths, toys, etc. on top of my counters and all over my kitchen table. Toys are all over my living room, the kids’ rooms need to be picked up, and the laundry needs put away. I am trying to reiterate to myself this year that it’s the season of life we are in. It’s okay that my house is messier than I would like. I mean hey, I have two kids under age two and there are more important tasks than getting rid of the extra clutter right now.
As they get older and more independent, hopefully they can help out more and I will have more time to keep up with the mess. But for now, I’m going to (try) to give myself a little grace and accept that my house is messy in this season of life.
Life is all about priorities. Yes, I could clean in the morning before the kids get up on work days, but I choose to work out instead. Right now my fitness health is more important to me than having an immaculate looking house. If I don’t work out in the morning before the kids get up and work, I won’t do it. By the time I get home, my focus becomes feeding, bathing, and playing with the kids until bedtime. After the kids get to bed, I need to go to bed myself. I’m one of those that NEED sleep. Sleep is a number one priority (I don’t function without it), so until I become a Vampire who requires no sleep, I have to pick and choose.
One Day I’ll Do What I Want and I’ll Long For the Days I Couldn’t Do What I Wanted
One day my kids will be all grown up and on their own. I’ll have free Friday nights and be able to sleep in as late as I want. My house won’t be filled with toy clutter and my husband and I will go on a vacation whenever we want. I will finally get on a cleaning schedule while still maintaining my fitness health. But I’m willing to bet I’ll long for the times where I didn’t have time for myself. The times when my kids were small and all they wanted was me. I try to keep that in mind as I make dinner with an almost two-year-old on my hip or while I’m rocking my baby to sleep.
Each season of life has its positives and negatives as do all things in life. I am trying my best to enjoy the season of life I’m in now with all its chaos, but I look forward to the future seasons.